Florida Senior Ads


Is This What We Have to Look Forward to

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Some "Senior" personal ads seen in Florida newspapers:


FOXY LADY: 
Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 
80's, slim, 5'4" (used to be 5'6"), 
searching for sharp-looking, 
sharp-dressing companion. 
Matching white shoes and belt a plus. 


LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: 
Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, 
and am looking for someone to 
round out a six-unit plot. 
Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath 
not a problem. 

SERENITY NOW: 
I am into solitude, long walks, 
sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. 
If you are the silent type, let' s get together, 
take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times. 


BEATLES OR STONES? 
I still like to rock, 
still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights 
and still like to play the guitar. 
If you were a groovy chick, 
or are now a groovy hen, 
let's get together 
and listen to my eight-track tapes. 

WINNING SMILE: 
Active grandmother with original teeth 
seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks,
corn on the cob and caramel candy


MEMORIES: 
I can usually remember 
Monday through Thursday. 
If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, 
let's put our two heads together. 

MINT CONDITION: 
Male, 1932, high mileage, 
good condition, some hair, 
many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. 
Isn't in running condition, but walks well.
 

 

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